Just fourteen
And poor
Up at 3 in the morning
Ink stains on the fingers
Delivering to people who stare from windows
And demand their service
From a boy too young to masturbate
At the speed and competency of
A well-paid businessman
There were two houses
That made me first believe in hell
Beyond the world I knew
The first
A man would stare at me
Just stare at me
I would wave
I would ignore him
He would not say or do anything
Just stare
Perhaps taking my soul
And when I got
Halfway round the block
He’d come out, take the paper
And disappear
As if I planned to bite him
And the second
A house surrounded in so many trees
Once you entered the gate
You were forever lost
Dark and forgotten
In the midst of more cobwebs than the dead
And noises from malicious squirrels
Maybe the dead
Likely the owner who laughs
At the fear of an innocent
Upon delivering the paper one day
So afraid of the house that I cried
I stepped out of the gate
Emerging into the light of life again
A black dog from hell went streaking across my path
It came within a half foot of my legs
Oblivious to my screams
And turned to snap, just once
Before continuing down the sidewalk
At full run
So fast he was gone before I could comprehend
So fast that he was gone before I stopped screaming
I broke on the route soon after
In the snow
Staring into the bush for hours and
Thinking and feeling nothing
I lost the job though I needed the money
And the devil was still behind me
Today I give my youth the evil eye and
Still can’t realize how a young man did
The things I did and survived
As an adult, I would crumble
My heart would end with the first vision of the Cerberus
My legs would wilt
And I would kill the man who stared
Because he is me